Amazing Grace

eNCA late night news for the first time since Lesley's passing. He was my biggest fan. Learnt of his death after reading my last bulletin on 8th July 2017. Life will never be the same. Rest in Peace my love. 

You would be so proud of me baby. The last time I read a news bulletin was the day I was told you are gone forever. I remember that day like it was yesterday. I still remember the way I was screaming. In disbelief. I wanted Angelo to take back the words he told me.
Today I braved the cold brought by that memory. I went back on air and I did this in your memory. You were so proud of me. Always expressing excitement and even making big plans on top of the dreams we both shared. You believed in me even when I was blinded by doubt. Now I'm looking back at the last few hours and amazed that I didn't break down. The whole experience is another reminder that you are really gone. Is this what "life goes on" feels like?  Every milestone and every achievement without you is painful. I seek your validation and motivation. They came from a warm and genuine place. I was always guaranteed love and honesty. I miss you Les.
I'm still shocked that I pulled it off. I must confess I did check my phone to see if you sent me anything. You always sent text messages telling me to sit up straight or sometimes make fun of me when I fluff. But you always told me how handsome I am. And never stopped saying how proud you were. I worked with the same crew that received the news about your passing with me. They were supportive and we declared today's broadcast to be in your memory. You are loved and missed sthandwa sam.